Monday, March 21, 2011

what love will do-part 1

Meet Matthew.
Otherwise known as my mister, mansky, doodle, bubba, or whatever else I decide to call him that day.

He played basketball at college...and he loves talking about it, thinking about it, and playing it as much as possible.

Anywho, we met at school and have been together for 2 1/2 years:)
Now we're engaged.

Matthew's different than any other guy I've ever met. We "talked" for about two years before we even became official. He respected me, talked to me, listened to me, and loved me. We were "talking" for about 6 months when I began struggling with food. It came about after my third knee surgery when I felt defeated, lost, and confined. I was tired of taking months off from activity and I felt like a complete failure.

I started "running" (really it was just a fast walk) within three weeks of the surgery. DUMB. I was convinced that I had done plenty of therapy and my knee was just fine. On top of that, I was watching what I was eating in an obsessed way(journaling). I'm not sure it was ever intentional. I wasn't doing it because I wanted to be a certain size, but I was doing it because I wanted to control something. After the many surgeries and then my doctor telling me that soccer was no more, I needed something to hold on to. Journaling my food intake was one of the worst things I could have done.

My food intake starting decreasing as the days went on. It started out as me skipping one meal and it quickly turned into skipping every meal that I could. If I was going to eat, it was going to be small. As I was able to start running, I ran more. Within two months of my surgery, I was averaging 5 miles a day. On top of that, I wasn't eating. This went on for months, my energy started decreasing, I started hiding, and I began feeling ashamed.

I finally decided to tell Matthew. I sat him down and told him my struggles, my pain, and my weakness. He listened to me, hugged me, and then prayed for me. This was the first time we prayed together, and definitely the first time a guy prayed for me. Little did we know that this was only the beginning...

As the months went on, I began falling into depression. I started realizing that I couldn't keep up with this. My body was crying for more, it was tired and it was weak, and I only made things worse.

But Matthew never left my side.

There is more to this story, but it would make for a very long post. I've decided to name these "what love will do" so keep your eyes out for them.

I will leave you with this picture from the weekend though:)

In what ways has someone shown love to you?

"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."
1 Peter 4:8


  1. Jenny this is beautiful, thank you! I struggle daily, I still log what I eat trying to exercise and burn more than I take in. I have talked to my parents about it, my boyfriend, friends, etc. Before I go somewhere I calorie count, I am glad someone else can relate, thank you for sharing your heart!

  2. This is a great post and I am looking forward to the series! I am going through a similar time now, and my boyfriend is standing by me even when I felt he may be "better off" without my problems. But he is showing me what love truly is. :)

  3. what a great idea! i love it! and you can see how much he loves you in your pictures:)

  4. I used to be so cynical about love until I found it! Sweet post!