My devotion today starts off with, "Your needs are my riches."
It's funny, because today as I sat there, feeling alone and NEEDY, I was interrupted with a voice from God. "You are angry because you want to be busy." I was wanting to fill my day with things, thoughts, and people. Instead, God wanted me to sit, listen, and pray. I realized today that my absence of joy is from my desires of worldly things. Satan uses my great characteristic of Joy against me. Satan whispers in my ear, "you will only be happy if you GO, and DO." When I'm not thinking about food, when I'm not eating...I'm "happy." In order for me to be "happy," i must fill my schedule and constantly be going. Everyday, some part of my devotion always says "rest in my presence." There is a reason why that is repeated almost everyday. In order for me to grow close to God and to really be joyful, I must allow God to bring it to me. I cannot expect people or things to bring me happiness. My biggest struggle has always been silencing and resting my mind. To forget about all of my "problems" and tasks, is difficult. But when i give those problems and tasks to God, he frees me. I've never felt so free.
Last year, if I was dealing with what I dealt with today, I'd be sleeping or doing something.
But today, I'm writing, and listening to what God is saying to me. I can become more wise and "rich" because God is carrying me.